Transcription:Faker Crashes the Party
(Sketch begins in Skeletor's castle with Beast Man and Evil-Lyn sitting eating breakfast in a kitchen as Skeletor appears with an invitation.) Skeletor: Behold! An invitation to King Randor's Birthday Party! This is our chance to conquer Castle Grayskull, once and for all! Evil-Lyn: I'm sure we're not on the guest list, Skeletor! Skeletor: Well of course not, you stupid twat! But what if we had a magical clone of He-Man? Evil-Lyn: Well I suppose, hypothetically..... Skeletor: AH! We do! We have.. a magical clone.. of He-Man. (Ease out to Beast Man taking off a cape revealing the clone of He-Man, Faker, but his skin is blue and his armor is red-orange.) Beast Man: (singsong) DA DA DA DA! Skeletor: What the hell is this, Beast Man? He's blue! Beast Man: Well I'm half dog. Everything's shades of gray to me. Faker: Me He-Man! Skeletor: Oh, and his personal pronouns are all fucked up? I mean where's the verb in that sentence? (Skeletor puts his hand to his face in frustration) Skeletor: GAH!! (pause) Eh! I'm a gambler! (Image then changes to Castle Grayskull and we take an inside look of the castle with a quiet and peaceful tone.) King Randor: That's the thing about Feudal Agriculture. (A hard slam of the door reveals Faker. Everyone gasps) Prince Adam/He-Man: Hey! Just who the heck do you think you- (Faker pushes him out of the way) Faker: Out my way, homo! King Randor: Ha! He hit that nail on the head! (Faker goes to a table eating many types of food and Teela appears next to him.) Teela: He-Man! What a pleasant surprise! We really weren't expecting you. Faker: Nice Boobies! Teela: Oh! Oh my! Thank you, He-Man. (Orko comes to him with hot chocolate) Orko: He-Man, you look cold! I brought you some piping hot co.... (Faker hits hot coco and spreads all over Orko's eyes.) Orko: AHHH!! MY EYES ARE BLISTERING! WHY?! (The guests start laughing hard, but Prince Adam/He-Man appears mad and jealous.) Prince Adam/He-Man: We'll see about this! Huh! (He-Man leaves to change and Skeletor, Evil-Lyn and Beast Man are outside watching through the window that the party was terrorized; Skeletor laughs quietly.) Skeletor: You hear that? Faker must be going all blood-crazy on their asses! (They look through the window and see party lights and inside the castle is a wild party.) Man-At-Arms: What'd I miss? (Teela stands on a table with King Randor dancing in the bottom.) Teela: He-Man pulled the stick out of his butt and he's whipping this party's ass with it! WHOO!!! (Faker is dancing wildly and... SKELETOR BREAKS IN) Skeletor: WHAT THE HELL, MAN?! (Everyone gasps and Beast Man and Evil-Lyn appear next to him.) Skeletor: Well? What do you have to say for yourself? (They mute for 4 seconds and Faker.....STABS SKELETOR ON THE FACE WITH A SWORD, KILLING HIM! Everyone gasps and then go right back to cheering leaving Beast Man and Evil-Lyn alone together.) Beast Man: Oh, poopy! (The normal He-Man then appears) Prince Adam/He-Man: Hey everybody! I'm here! It's me! The real He-Man! (The party is paused with guys holding Faker upside down drinking beer as everyone looks at him. He then looks shocked and horrified as he sees a spear with Skeletor's head, Beast Man's skin cut and hung on the wall, and Evil-Lyn in a stock being hit by fruits and vegetables on her ass. Prince Adam/He-Man talks to the cloned He-Man.) Prince Adam/He-Man: Those...Those were my archenemies! How dare you! All: TWO HE-MANS?! Mekaneck: Wouldn't the plural be He-Men? All: WHICH ONE IS THE REAL HE-MEN?! Prince Adam/He-Man: Citizens of Eternia! I am shocked at this behavior! Excessive violence! Binge drinking! Haven't I set a better example than that? All: BOOOO! Stinkor: BOO! YOU STINK!! Teela: This He-Man sure sucks the fun out of the room. King Randor: YOU'RE RUINING MY PARTY!! Prince Adam/He-Man: But I- King Randor: Look, I'll make this simple. Everyone who thinks this is the real He-Man, raise your hands. (Everyone raises their hands to the cloned He-Man) King Randor: Everyone who thinks this is the real He-Man, raise your hands. (Prince Adam/He-Man and Faker raise their hands) King Randor: Well, then it's settled! (The party then continues showing once again the spear with Skeletor's head and then speeds through to the spear of He-Man's head. Scene then shows Faker dancing with Teela.) Faker: Dance! Dance! Dance! Oh yeah! I Boogy! Boogy! Dance! Dance! Dance! Man-At-Arms: Well done, Prince Adam! Faker: Who Prince Adam? Man-At-Arms: Oops! Faker: Boogy! Boogy! Boogy! Category:Transcriptions